That’s what they say – the best student, that’s the one who sits in the front. But later they found out why. The ones who sit right in the back, or from half a meter, they’re very distracted. They don’t pay attention to what the teacher says that much, as the ones who sit in the front. […] Now I remember; those who sit in the first one or two rows are always the good students. The best ones are the… In my class, in my classes that I remember, why I always sat in the front? Because I was the smallest in the class. The teacher would take me and put me in the front. Even when I was in India, in any ashram, any master, any teacher, even if I sat right in the back, he always said, “Come here, you little one. Sit here.” […]
I’m not doing it on purpose. I always swear that I’ll arrive on time. I don’t know what it is, I still arrive late. Not that I do it on purpose. I really don’t like to be late. For example, yesterday, Tong told me to get ready by 11:00 for the award presentation. I was ready at 11:00. So, I called her and asked, “I’m coming down now. Ready?” She said, “Not yet, Master. Wait a moment, and come down in a few minutes.” I said, “You told me 11:00. Now I’m ready already. No, I’m coming down anyway.” And I truly wanted to come down because I was all ready. My hair and everything were done; all dressed with makeup on. I had my high heels on as well. Not a problem at all. I wanted to start the car. But my stomach ended up aching. And you know, your… Your cheongsam that gets people into trouble is so tight. When I wanted to go to a place, I had to take it off first, and put it back on afterwards. Then my hair was ruined, and I had to do it again. Phew! Unbearable. It kept me so busy that I didn’t come down till almost 12:00.
There was really nothing I could do. I didn’t do it on purpose. The thing I was most happy about yesterday was being ready on time at 11:00. Everything was ready. I even called Tong to “threaten” her because she always hurries me. Being born in the year of the rat, she’s always so hasty. I have a few “rats” here. They’re always so nervous and anxious. For example, if I have to get to the airport at three for a flight, she’d definitely tell me two o’clock. And then… Then she’d “seize” me from my comfortable house, and put me on the freeway to enjoy the “fresh” air, and the smell of tobacco, people’s sweat, perfume and whatever at the airport for one hour. Only then could I slowly get on the plane. It’s like that. She’s always like that all these years. And each time she’s always anxious like that. I can’t say what is wrong about it. I just know she’s always hurrying. It’s OK that she hurries anybody. But it’s her boss that she’s hurrying. The whole office knows about her impatient personality. But she forgets and counts me in too as one of the members of the office who she randomly controls. Too many stories. There are endless stories to tell.
Strange. Those “rats” (Chinese zodiac sign) are all very noisy. The one who bugged me this morning is too. Tong is also a “rat.” And the one taking photos just now who has been bugging me for many years till now is also a “rat.” And the one asking me to cut the ribbon for his woodwork factory today is also a “rat.” Do you think I can stand it? The personality of the “rat” is like that, running through very fast. They didn’t do it on purpose. Otherwise, it’d be disastrous. Already like that even though they were unintentional; if they are intentional, how unbearable would it be?? Our place here is a “zoo” with all kinds of “animal(-people).” And having to put up with their personalities makes me very tired.
It’s better now, really? No? No? Then you hear nothing! You do, or you don’t? (A little.) No? But you stay here or not? (Well, it’s just, if there’s applause…) Applause then you cannot hear. The Taiwanese (Formosan) people, I cannot tell them. I told them many times, wait until after (to applaud), but they always do it. Try to put up with it. I will talk to you in English tonight or tomorrow if you stay. Exclusively. Actually, today I already wanted to speak English. It’s just that the majority make me struggle. And that’s what makes me also frustrated, and (puts me in a) bad mood.
Because really, it’s difficult to deal with languages in this world – there’re so many languages. But most people understand English, those who came from abroad, even Japanese or Korean. They understand, and Aulacese (Vietnamese) understand. Just the Taiwanese (Formosan), they don’t understand. And even they don’t understand Chinese, can you believe it? Many people who sit behind there need translation, because they only speak Taiwanese (Formosan). I can never win. So many languages in the world. Even if I start from my birth, I can never finish. And even if I can finish, I cannot speak all the time, at one time in different languages. That’s the problem. I feel sorry for you. Yes, I really sympathize with you, because you came from such a long way. And very rarely do Occidental people sit with their long legs on the floor, and suffer so much. But you relax, you do what you want. OK? You can kick the neighbour and have more room. Otherwise, what can I do? They like to squeeze in the front, the closer the better.
But actually, people say, when you want to improve in your class, you should sit in the front – the first row, next to the teacher. That’s according to research. Why is sitting in the front the best? They say the best students are always the ones who sit in the front row. I can testify to that; I was a best student, and I sat in the front row. Maybe because I sat in the front row that I was a best student. One of the two or three best. Always the first, or the second, or the third in the class. Maybe because I sat in the front, I don’t know. But that’s what they say – the best student, that’s the one who sits in the front. But later they found out why. The ones who sit right in the back, or from half a meter, they’re very distracted. They don’t pay attention to what the teacher says that much, as the ones who sit in the front. Maybe because when you sit in the front, the teacher is there, you cannot fiddle. You cannot write names on the school table and things like that. And those from the half-back, they always write on the table. But never the front row. Never the front one or two rows.
Now I remember; those who sit in the first one or two rows are always the good students. The best ones are the… In my class, in my classes that I remember, why I always sat in the front? Because I was the smallest in the class. The teacher would take me and put me in the front. Even when I was in India, in any ashram, any master, any teacher, even if I sat right in the back, he always said, “Come here, you little one. Sit here.” I always enjoyed spoiling like that.
So when you sit in the front, you should be very fortunate, and lucky, and happy. You should not disturb the teacher. And you should not disturb the whole congregation because you are right in the front. Whatever you do, they see. Whatever you do disturbs them. Distracts them. That’s a terrible karma when you disturb the whole congregation of Buddhas. Look like, look like Buddhas.
Do you all understand? (Understand.) No problem. I’m very sorry, but I will speak to you in English another time. Because most of them are Taiwanese (Formosan), and they don’t see me as much as you do. The same thing; because I don’t stay here anymore. I used to, but now I come now and again, only a few days, so they also have the right to listen to my speech. I’m very sorry that the world is imperfect. So many different languages, even among you, the white flakes. How many languages? Swedish, Deutsch (German), French, Hollandish (Dutch), Belgians, they speak Hollandish (Dutch)… All kinds. Even in one country, sometimes they speak three languages, like in Switzerland: Italian, French, German. And sometimes (they) sprinkle English in between.
And in England sometimes they speak Yorkshire, and you understand nothing. Or in Germany when they speak Bavarian… Oh! I surrender. You know what I mean? Yeah! Right! Only in Âu Lạc (Vietnam) they speak the same language, with little different accents, but we understand each other. In China, 120 plus different dialects, and no one understands the other. Even in India, from the South, they don’t understand the North. Bombay doesn’t understand Tamil Nadu etc., etc. It’s so terrible. Sometimes I just don’t want to look at the world anymore. How can you work? But that’s the problem, that’s the fault of the Babel Tower (Tower of Babel). Babel Tower, you know, the “blah-blah blah-blah” tower.
Do you all understand? No problem. I asked them if they all understood. “No problem.” I just told them that… they… But do you want to leave now? Do you want to go? (No, we don’t.) Is there anyone who wants to go? Raise your hand. In a hurry for a date with your girlfriend or something, anyone? (No.) Because it’s already past the time. I don’t want to hold you up. (No.) Is it OK? (No rush.) (OK.) OK. And then? What happens after we leave? You just dismiss, right? (Yes.) That’s all? OK. Are there buses waiting for you? (It’s alright.) It’s alright? Do you have to pay extra for it? (Probably not.) No? OK.
I’ll say a little more. Well… According to the… Is it “according to” in Chinese? According to statistics, they say that if you want your child to be top of the class, tell him/her to sit in the front, in front of the teacher – in the first, second, or third row of the classroom. I think maybe because I always sat in the front, that was why I was always first, second, or third in my class. Maybe it really works. For me, it did. And those sitting in the front like me were all smart students. They looked into the reasons why and now they’re saying, maybe because children in the front rows can’t do things like drawing names or doodling hands and faces on the desk at will, they keep listening to the teacher. That’s why they learn better. Those in the back rows often draw the likes of snake-people, cattle-people on the desks or chairs, and stealthily eat bread and steamed buns, and so on. That’s why they’re not attentive. Maybe it’s like that. Because it’s hard for the teacher to keep those in the back in line. He can’t see them that clearly.
That’s why I say, likewise, you who sit in the front are supposed to be the most blessed and the most honored. You should be the most careful with not wandering around to display yourself. They had already announced that I was coming down before I came. And I left 15 minutes for those wandering ones to come back quickly. But it was the same. When I got here, there were still several wandering around in the front. Those sitting in the front have to be most careful because the people in the back can all see you. Since you’re sitting in the front, whatever you do would affect them. Right? They want to listen to me, but get distracted. Making too much noise is not OK either. For example, when everyone claps, you also clap, but don’t clap louder than others. You can also laugh when everyone laughs, but don’t laugh louder than others on purpose. Understand? When people don’t laugh, don’t laugh out loud and go “ha, ha” alone. You’d really scare the others. For example like that.
No need to overdo anything. Whatever you do, do it naturally. You should be aware of your proper role. This place belongs to the public, it’s not yours alone. I’d also get distracted when you wander around and display yourself like that. Understand? I can’t lie to you and say, “No matter what you do, I still wouldn’t lose my concentration.” That is nonsense. Because you’re obstructing my eyes. Sometimes there would still be some problems in that. There are. Understand? (Understand.) Then after sitting there, the person would deliberately… Sometimes she’d deliberately display herself to attract my attention. Because if I glance over and skip her, she’d do something over there on purpose. “I am over here.” She’s got to get me to look at her by all means. That’s even more annoying. Do you understand what I mean? (Yes.) You don’t know. When I sit here, it’s like sitting on needles sometimes, as if my chair has grown needles. Please.
Every three-day and seven-day retreat, I swear that it’d be the last one. But then I’d forget later, just like you having babies. When you have a baby, you’d say, “Ah, I’m fed up. I won’t have any more babies.” Then you forget. When he/she gets bigger and becomes so cute, you miss the little him/her, and you forget again. Then you have another one and say, “Oh, no. This is not OK. No. No more babies from now on.” Then you forget again. It’s like that every time. OK. I hope I can forget often as well. Otherwise, I cannot work in this world. I don’t know why. This job is very tiring.
Photo Caption: Even Stones Try Hard to Show Their Bright Side
